These are the humane ways of the ants

I have always been precocious. As a child I was extremely careful and patient, I never created problems for my parents and spent most of my spare time alone in my room. There I created a world of my own, a world without any known borders. It was a relief to be alone at times.

There is very little I despise more than humanity. We're like ants, don't you see? Here we are, crawling over the surface of the earth during daytime, stealing and devouring everything that is of use to us. Then, when the night arrives we crawl back to into our dens to feed. Our queen's words are the law; we only follow her instructions, even when they lead to the death and suffering of millions. Then there is war, this instinct we have to destroy each other in order to enlarge our kingdom.

Then there is a question of humanity, always a questioning of the humanity. Was this a humane way of solving things?

What exactly is humanity? In my opinion it certainly isn't loving and caring for each other, because we rarely do unless it's one of our own. What about the millions of starving children with no future ahead of them, when did we last love and care for them? As they die we send a few dollars and feel a little better about ourselves. It's selfish, isn't it?

Yes, I have always been scared of the ants. I have always been precocious and never made a sound. I have always been alone.

But I'm not so different from other teenagers after all, even if my greatest fear is to come to feel like I belong among the others. I don't wish to take a part in their "humane" ways of thinking.